The Ultimate 7-Step Guide on How to Introduce Siblings to a New Baby

How to introduce siblings to a new baby
Picture of Bere Horthy

Bere Horthy

Doula & Registered Nurse

As any parent who has navigated these waters would know, figuring out how to introduce siblings to a new baby is no small feat.

Sibling relationships form some of the longest bonds we have in our lifetime. 

The introduction of a new baby into a family, while exciting, can be a huge change for older siblings. 

It’s not just about the first meeting – though that is crucial. 

It’s about creating a bond that will last a lifetime, a bond that starts from the first introduction and continues to grow over the years.

In this article, we’re going to walk you through a carefully curated 7-step process to introduce your older children to their new sibling. 

These are practical steps that you can incorporate into your family’s routine.

Starting from the moment you find out about your pregnancy up until you’ve all adjusted to your new family dynamic. 

Let’s get started.

daughter touching mothers pregnant belly

Preparing to introduce siblings

Step 1 –  Start early

An essential first step when introducing siblings to a new baby is to begin preparations early. 

As the saying goes, “forewarned is forearmed,” and providing plenty of notice and education about the upcoming addition to the family will help older siblings adjust to the idea.

Engage your children in conversations about your pregnancy. 

Explain that a new member is joining the family, and do this in a way that suits their level of understanding. 

This could be as simple as saying that mommy is growing a new brother or sister in her tummy.

Invite your children to prenatal visits if it’s feasible and appropriate. 

They can listen to the baby’s heartbeat or even see the baby during ultrasound screenings. 

These experiences help make the pregnancy more tangible for them and can build excitement about the new arrival.

You might also find children’s books and stories about new babies and siblings particularly helpful. 

There are many beautifully illustrated, engaging books available that tackle the topic in a sensitive, fun, and engaging way. 

Reading these together can help your child visualise the changes that are about to occur and set the stage for a smooth transition.

Step 2 –  Answer their questions

As the pregnancy progresses, your older child or children are bound to have questions about the new baby. 

Embrace this curiosity. 

Keeping open communication about their feelings and fears is key to helping them feel secure.

Respond to all of their questions honestly, using age-appropriate language. 

If they ask where babies come from, provide a simple explanation that fits their level of understanding. 

If they ask about why mom’s belly is growing, you can explain it’s because the baby is growing.

Furthermore, it’s important to discuss what changes the new baby will bring. 

Younger children may not understand that babies require a lot of care and won’t be playmates right away. 

You might explain that babies sleep, eat, and cry a lot, but soon they’ll grow and become more interactive.

When tackling these questions, remember to keep your tone positive and reassure your older child that your love and attention for them will remain steadfast. 

This two-step process helps to prepare them, laying the groundwork to successfully introduce siblings to the new baby and fostering a loving bond between them from the start.

older brother looking and baby sister in crib

How to introduce siblings

Step 3 –  Make the first meeting special

Now you’ve spent many months preparing them for this event — how to introduce siblings in the right way?

The first meeting between siblings is a momentous occasion and should be treated as such. 

It can shape the initial feelings and attitudes the older sibling will have towards their new sister or brother.

To ensure a positive start, it’s important to arrange the first meeting in a neutral, comfortable space. 

This could be a quiet corner of your living room or even a favourite park, provided the baby is ready for an outing. 

This helps prevent the older sibling from feeling like their personal space is being invaded.

Furthermore, empowering the older sibling with a special role during the meeting can contribute to a sense of responsibility and involvement. 

This role could be as simple as helping to unwrap the baby’s new blanket or reading their favourite picture book to the baby.

An excellent way to create a positive connection from the start is to let the older sibling offer a gift to the baby. 

This could be a stuffed animal, a drawing they made, or a new baby book.

Step 4 –  Encourage gentle interaction

After the initial introduction, fostering gentle interaction between the new baby and their older sibling is crucial. 

Older siblings should be taught safe ways to touch and hold the baby. 

Simple instructions such as using “gentle hands” or showing them how to support the baby’s head can go a long way in ensuring the safety of the newborn.

It’s also important to talk about hygiene when interacting with the baby.

Children should be encouraged to wash their hands before touching the baby and be aware of not sharing their food or drinks with the newborn to avoid any potential illness.

Finally, help the older sibling feel like they are contributing to caring for the baby. 

This could mean asking for their assistance during bath time, letting them choose the baby’s outfit for the day, or helping to gather diaper supplies.

These shared tasks can give the older sibling a sense of pride and foster a caring attitude towards their younger sibling.


Adjusting siblings to new life

Step 5 – Balance your time

Navigating the waters of postpartum life while simultaneously tending to your other children’s needs is a delicate dance. 

It’s crucial to keep a harmonious balance that ensures everyone feels included and loved.

Implementing techniques for giving siblings attention while caring for a new baby is essential. 

You can involve older siblings in the baby’s care routines like diaper changes, bathing, or bedtime stories, provided they are interested and willing. 

This not only gives you some much-needed assistance but also helps them feel involved.

Look for activities that can engage everyone in the family. 

For instance, taking a walk with the baby and siblings can be a great bonding time.

Or maybe a cosy family movie night where the baby can sleep nearby, and the siblings can enjoy some cuddly time with you.

Importantly, remember the value of one-on-one time with older siblings. 

It can be as simple as reading their favourite book, playing a quick board game, or just chatting about their day. 

These interactions, even if they’re brief, can provide assurance that they’re still uniquely cherished, despite the new addition to the family.

Step 6 –  Foster their bond

It’s during this adjustment stage that the foundation of the sibling bond begins to solidify. 

One of the best ways to encourage this is by suggesting activities they can do together to strengthen their bond. 

An older sibling can engage in simple activities like singing to the baby, showing them colourful toys, or even just chattering away about their day – babies love listening to voices!

Regularly praising older siblings when they are kind or helpful with the baby can encourage such behaviour to continue. 

Affirmations like, “You’re such a good big brother/sister” or “Baby loves it when you…” can go a long way in fostering a positive relationship.

Despite your best efforts, there may be times when older siblings exhibit signs of regression or jealousy, which is completely normal. 

They may resort to babyish behaviour or act out to get your attention. 

It’s essential to handle these situations delicately. 

Maintain patience, openly discuss their feelings, and reassure them of their importance in the family.

sibling relationship
Source: Aleksandar Georgiev

The lifelong relationship

Step 7 – Keep communication open

One of the best strategies to maintain a healthy relationship between your children is to keep the lines of communication wide open. 

This involves regularly checking in with your older child about their feelings and emotions, which might vary and change over time.

Start by making it a habit to have frequent, casual conversations about their day, their likes and dislikes, and most importantly, their thoughts about the new baby. 

Encourage them to share any worries, fears, or concerns they might have, making sure they know that their feelings are valued and respected.

As your children grow, issues of sibling rivalry or feelings of neglect may naturally arise. 

Address these concerns proactively rather than reactively and in a non-judgmental way. 

For instance, if your older child starts acting out to grab attention, rather than scolding them, try to understand the root cause

They might just be feeling overlooked. 

Assure them that their feelings are important and that everyone in the family has enough love to go around.

Lastly, always reinforce the idea of the family team and each member’s special role. 

Remind your children regularly that every family member is unique and brings something special to the family dynamics. 

The older sibling’s role is especially important—they’re not just a brother or sister, but a role model for their younger sibling. 

Encourage them to take this role to heart, involving them in small, age-appropriate tasks to help with the baby.

By doing this, you can help establish a sense of pride and responsibility in your older child. 

When everyone in the family understands and values their unique role, it fosters a sense of unity and harmony—a team where everyone has a place and a purpose.

Embrace the adventure

So there you have it, the ultimate 7-step guide on how to introduce siblings to a new baby.

It’s an art of balancing emotions, nurturing bonds, and ensuring every child feels loved and valued. 

But remember, each family and each child is unique, so don’t be discouraged if things don’t go exactly as planned. 

The journey towards fostering a strong bond between siblings is one filled with numerous challenges, but the rewards are infinitely more profound. 

From their first curious interactions to the development of a deep-rooted connection, the joy and enrichment a sibling relationship brings to a child’s life is unmatched. 

As you guide your children through this remarkable journey, bear witness to the blossoming of a lifelong bond. 

This is the beginning of a unique relationship that will grow and deepen through shared experiences, laughter, and even the occasional quarrel. 

So embrace this adventure, and take heart in knowing that you’re nurturing a bond that will last a lifetime.

Bere Horthy

As a doula and nurse, Bere's mission is to empower and educate women, families, and fellow doulas to make informed decisions throughout their pregnancy, birth, and postpartum journey.


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